Subject PDP Reflective Statement – LEVEL 6

512 Words

For the subject module and entirety of my final year, I have been tackling the challenging topic of grief. I have discovered that my main interest and focus is about people; from human emotions and reactions throughout life’s events. This topic is relatable to everybody as we all grieve.
I have looked into various funeral rites from different cultures, for example New Orleans Jazz Funeral.
I discovered my main interest was the way in we grieve in Britain. The way in which we prepare ourselves and sometimes avoid our feelings.

In my subject work I gathered research from my personal experiences. As the first hand
The majority of my experiences of grieving were from my childhood.
Death is a topic often avoided and always one that people struggle to explain to children.
I created different compositions from specific memories and what stood out to me from these memories were the way adults would react around me. Often hiding their emotions but not realising I could see their feelings.
My first memory was at the wake of my grandfather. This stood out to me because I realised I wasn’t taken to the funeral but kept back to prepare the table with the food and drink ready for hosting the wake.
Another painting I created was inspired by a memory from my father crying which wasn’t something I had ever seen. He had gone upstairs and after a couple of minutes I follow and just watched through the bannister. This is an example of an adult putting on a strong front and hiding their true emotions.
Some of the ideas behind my paintings were taken from memories of the way I was feeling at the time. Hearing family members argue or cry from another room.
People trying to run and hide from grieving may turn to alcohol or other ways to numb their mind to hide the feelings from themselves and bury them deep inside.

After my grandmother went into hospital at the end of last year I noticed my family prepare themselves to grieve with talking about the arrangements that would take place in the event of her passing away. This fortunatley didn’t happen but I learnt that people go through this preparation to try and make it easier for themselves when the time comes.
The ways in which adults would try to distract me as a child from my own feelings and witnessing their grieving by giving me responsibilities. responsibilities like looking after something, putting the kettle on, making cups of tea, carrying the shopping.

Grieving is quite often buried away from the outside world, kept private and behind closed doors. The image always comes to mind of wearing a smiling face as a mask.
Another part of grieving is not caring anymore; about what people think or materialistic things.

The aspects of preparation, packing up of a life and hiding emotions lead my to the encounter. My key influences from my subject work are from my personal memories and the collaborations of sounds with images to pull people into the animation.


Encounter Reflective Statement PDP -Level 6

557 Words

Throughout the whole process of deciding what to do for my final piece for the Encounter Exhibition I knew that I wanted to create an animation.
In my subject work I gathered research from my personal experiences. As the first hand

The majority of my experiences of grieving were from my childhood.
I created different compositions from specific memories and what stood out to me from these memories were the way adults would react around me. Often hiding their emotions.

The narrative of the animation follows a child as they are taken to their grandparents home and is sat infront of the television to keep them out of the way and shield them from the families sadness as they pack up the persons life who has passed away. Obviously the child sees that something is not right and wanders around coming across different family members privately grieving. After travelling back to their own home the ashes of the grandparent are put into a flower pot. Once the flower has blossomed this represents acceptence and the child feeling happiness remembering her relationship with the grandparent.

I wanted this to relate to the audience and think about how as a culture we hide our emotions and how this effects people, most importantly children, surrounding us. I hope the ending to the animation uplifts people and makes them think of memories of their loved ones.

 

To make my stop frame animation I have used mixed media ranging from painted, drawn and 3D models. I believe that mixed media will create a jittery and restless feeling alongside the digitally recorded sounds.

I have never used a digital recorder before but it was quite an easy piece of equipment to use. I recorded sounds like the ticking of a clock, traffic and the kettle boiling. In my personal experiences of grieving I remember whilst my mind was going through denial and confusion certain sounds would stand out over others. For example, whilst someone is speaking their voice is muffled but the noise of running water from a tap is more overpowering.

Whilst editing the recorded sounds along with the animated scenes, the volumes of the sounds would jump; for example when the loud kettle jumps to the gentle ticking of a clock. I think this adds to the uneasy and jittery feeling and also shows my memory of how I heard things whilst being in denial and angry.

The main image that sticks in my mind is cardboard boxes and the mark left from a photo frame leaving the clean wall behind. The stage after somebodies life where their belongings and possessions have to be packed up and taken away. Leaving an empty home with imprints from that persons life.

The thought process for planning my exhibition space was originally to create an environment with taped up cardboard boxes and marks left on the wall from photo frames. This idea I was described as too distracting therefore I felt I would incorporate these aspects and characteristics into the scenes of my animation.

 

 

 

 

 

 


GIF MAKING

Untitled-1Untitled-4


Grief – 3D MODELS

FullSizeRender(8)FullSizeRender(10)Grief_034_01_X1_0002


GRANNY GIF

grannygifoffish1


Grief Paintings

IMG_5021IMG_5192IMG_5357IMG_4950FullSizeRender(14)


Exhibition Space Planning

FullSizeRender(4)FullSizeRender(2)FullSizeRender(5)